deep sky, firefly (rainsinger) wrote,
deep sky, firefly

the year starts with a bang, and a whimper, and matei saying 'i heard thunder'

Matei has enjoyed Christmas so much that he keeps trying to instigate repeats. 'Is Santa coming today?' he inquires almost daily, and can only with the greatest difficulty be persuaded not to a)keep taking all the ornaments off the tree in order to put them back again and b)hanging them all on the same branch. We succeeded in keeping present-fest minimal (one gift from me and Z, and one gift from aunts and uncles) but even so he got a bit overwhelmed. Z and I bought him a big toy tractor and trailer (which he initially used to ferry his other wrapped presents around), but he's since really got into present-receiving mode and will occasionally get up in the morning and announce that he would like some more gifts. Ah, my little capitalist (who when asked who the presents were from said: "Father Christmas bought them in a shop").

Going out for New Year's Eve celebrations was one of the first things I renounced when I had a child (I remember New Year's Eve 2007 as a time when we heard some fireworks in between the wailings of our discontented child and went 'HNY then' to each other and carried on with the sleep deprivation and the attempt-to-soothe-through-pacing). To be honest, this has not been a big loss since greeting the new year has always been my least favourite holiday, and planning what to do like a minefield of social tension and failure (who invited you, or didn't? quick, think of something shiny and exciting to do!) so renouncing it all has been a relief.

New Year's resolutions are the other things I have been phasing out of my life (last year's were : 'Wear more makeup' and 'Develop facial beauty regimen' but even so I probably did it a handful of times. Thank God my skin appears to be as naturally indestructible as my late Russian Grandmother's legendary digestive system; the woman could have eaten carrion without being adversely affected).

This year the only resolution I have is to finish the final year of my therapist training by July and it's going to be a tough one, unless my health magically improves. After an easy start, this pregnancy has been much harder than my previous one. In fact over the past two months symptoms of illness and pregnancy have blended with each other so well as to create an almost seamless whole which leaves me constantly nauseated, exhausted and doing a risk assessment of World vs. My Enormous Bosoms.

And a (truncated) Some Stuff I Did in 2009 meme via yiskah and mockduck

New Year: Z and I stayed in, nibbled party foods, watched fireworks on telly and snogged each other at midnight and then shortly after that Matei wandered in rubbing sleep from his eyes - announcing that he had heard thunder and reassuring us that he wasn't scared by it and suggesting that we go read some books together. We suggested that he march back to bed and I had a nap on the sofa and a moan about how ill I feel, and Z played computer games until the small hours and it was time well-spent by anyone's standards.

Birthday: It was a good, albeit surreal birthday. I turned 29 in America, and to celebrate it I made faces and ate hamburgers and drank alcoholic milkshakes in Dirty Gurt's Burger Joynt, visited a sweet little town, indulged Z when he wanted to speak in Borat-voice and compare me to a bear , went on a paddle-boat cruise down the Missisipi with many, many, many Texan OAPs and one teenager who looked exactly like Napoleaon Dynamite, and eventually conviced Z to overcome his sense of dignity and dance with me to yodelled Elvis tunes played on a banjo.

Christmas: Stayed in, hosted Father Christmas who very soon after became ill with food poisoning and was violently sick in the garden, prompting Matei to confidentially inform me that 'Santa was spitting. Disguisting'. Visited people. Vegetated mostly and talked my way out of doing the dishes on account of 'Growing Life'.

Employment: I've been putting in two days a week of paid work since November 08. But with the deterioration of my health, a day of work actually wipes me out to the degree that I have to spend an hour on the sofa afterwards feeling shaky and feverish. Unless this improves I may have to quit work altogether if I want to manage the three days a week of training. This would be financially miserable indeed, so I'm hoping that my body has made its own secret resolutions to surprise me and heal itself.

Creative Energies: Mostly dismal, and neglected due to Life Stuff. Although I did make a child. And quite a few handmade cards.

Relationship: Continue to be more passionately in love with Z with every year spent together. He is a ridiculously good man.

Family: So much better on all counts. This has been the year of Enjoyable Motherhood and the year of getting along with my own mother, most of the time.

Travel: The usual annual back-and-forth to the ex-Yugoslavia, and then America - BlogHer and road trip which were amazing because of many things but mostly: seeing Susan, spending alone-time with Z and eating sushi I still dream about.

Friends: Confounding, mostly. Excellent people continuing to love me for reasons I don't quite understand. Other excellent people seeming to not love me for reasons I also don't understand.

Best Books Read: Chocolat and Five Quarters of the Orange by Joanne Harris. The The Yiddish Policemen's Union by Michael Chabon. It's Not Me, It's You by Stefanie Wilder-Taylor. And Cringe, obviously.

Best Films Seen: Seven Pounds, Waltz with Bashir, The Wrestler, The Reader, Coco Before Chanel and surprisingly, The Hangover.

Tags: books, films, life in review, links, parenthood, pregnancy
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