deep sky, firefly (rainsinger) wrote,
deep sky, firefly
rainsinger

Why I should only be trusted with a sedentary lifestyle

Yesterday an episode of me chasing the ball in the garden ended with me falling down the stairs, having first landed on the sharp edge of said stairs with my gluteal/lower back region.

Sometimes it is difficult to talk when you are blinded by exploding fireballs of pain, but I managed quite admirably to release a torrent of swearwords so prolific that the baby's vocabulary is sure to advance in leaps and bounds.

Despite the awesome cushioning capacity of my ass, the force of the blow was enough to move my pelvis slightly out of position and send my muscles into spasm, but thankfully my trusted beloved osteopath (whose children's college education is undoubtedly being financed by my inability to remain perpendicular when confronted with obstacles) managed to correct the damage and undoubtedly saved me from having to be ferried to my exam tomorrow in a wheelbarrow.

There are bruises of such size and lurid colouring covering my ass that propriety is the only thing that stands between me and their appearance on the internet.
Tags: body wonk, cautionary tales, ridiculous injury
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