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Today is my granny's hundredth birthday, and she celebrates a whole century of surviving the jolly wars of Europe and at least 80 years of telling people they are eating too much and that their buttocks are too big.

Happy 100 years granny! I hope you are having a splendid day. x

As for those among us who are unborn:

Apparently I am gestating a giant. Not a massively heavy baby but a tall one , whose long femur bones have pushed my uterus into my ribcage (Z: "Are you sure it's mine?") so that it's measuring several centimetres above average in fundal height causing people's heads to wrinkle with concern at antenatal appointments and me to enjoy all-you-can-eat wealth of ultrasounds. Thankfully the baby is still measuring within the normal range, just at the upper end of it.

By the sounds of it this is not an unusual occurence in the family. At birth I was a very tall, and very slim baby (Z: "So what went wrong?") and so were my ancestors.

As my achey breakey pelvic and I sail into the third trimester with its grim promises of how much worse I'm going to feel, and struggle to breathe for two people especially when one of them insists in kicking you in the spleen, I find myself once more seeking the refuge of the sofa as I did in those wretched first months.

Now it's not the tiredness that gets me so much as the pelvic pain which in particularly excruciating moments (like when I want to roll over in bed say) feels like two segments of a broken bone grinding together. Or else being repeatedly stabbed with an incadescent poker. Therefore my social activities of late have been reduced to petting the cats and weeping bitter tears (and First Cat for one is really enjoying me not being able to move, since immobile human = so much petting that he is starting to fray with the ecstasy).

Also, I think the baby likes to plan ahead. For about two months now at every appointment and scan he's been curled up head down, gently head-butting my cervix and bladder. This I expect is another vote for Camp Capricorn because I'd expect a future Sagittarian to get up to a lot more cartwheeling and whizzing around.

But it's not all doom and gloom in maternity world. My skin is flawless, my belly remains fairly compact, I am wearing blue fishnets and my booty has finally been united with a perfect pair of maternity jeans. If you can't have your health, you might as well have cute outfits I say.


( 16 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 4th, 2007 12:52 pm (UTC)
Congratulations to your hospitable and yet somewhat fearsome granny!

I shall look out giant knitting patterns for Giant Baby.
Oct. 5th, 2007 09:17 am (UTC)
I shall look out giant knitting patterns for Giant Baby

Wooo hooo! Extra points if they have subversive patterns on them.
Oct. 5th, 2007 01:49 pm (UTC)
Feh, I can barely do stripes, don't get too excited!
Oct. 4th, 2007 12:54 pm (UTC)
Happy Birthday, Granny! She has seen so much of history, including the dissolution of her home country (more than once), and of course two big wars. What a life.

Welcome to sciatica, Braxton-Hicks contractions, and squashed bladder and lungs. I thought I should have "Hindenburg" sewn onto my one remaining T-shirt that fit, by that time.


Oct. 5th, 2007 09:19 am (UTC)
Welcome to sciatica, Braxton-Hicks contractions, and squashed bladder and lungs. I thought I should have "Hindenburg" sewn onto my one remaining T-shirt that fit, by that time.

It's exactly like when people used to make me run with the other children when I was at school, and I'd be wiped out three quarters of the way through the track.
Oct. 4th, 2007 01:05 pm (UTC)
HB, G!

And hurry up; I want to see a minirainsinger/Z!
Oct. 5th, 2007 09:12 am (UTC)
I think I shall spend the month of December jumping up and down going Out! Enough!
Oct. 4th, 2007 01:30 pm (UTC)
Happy Birthday, granny of rainsinger :)

(Josef was a long, thin baby and he shot out of me in less than three hours with none of the dreaded tearing.)
Oct. 5th, 2007 09:13 am (UTC)
Ah, bliss, a happy labour story at last. Normally people prefer to regale me with 'I was in labour for two weeks, and I never had sex again' type fare.
Oct. 5th, 2007 09:19 am (UTC)
I try not to go on about it as I feel bad for bragging when everyone else, as you say, reports hellish labours, but mine was pretty wonderful as births go. And I had sex 3 weeks later. I wouldn't have waited that long, TBH, but Michal was scared he'd do some awful damage (although what he thought a willy could do that a whole baby couldn't is beyond me!).
Long, thin baby? Head down already? I'd say you're a perfect candidtae for a swift birth!
Oct. 4th, 2007 01:50 pm (UTC)
Oh, I dono about Camp Capricorn. Us Saggitarians like to travel and are keen for new horizons! Babyrain is just bored with the scenery!
Oct. 5th, 2007 09:15 am (UTC)
lol, he probably is bored with the scenery. :) (Although probably not as much as I'm bored of rib pain, natch. It's amazing how quickly tiresome that becomes).

Oct. 5th, 2007 09:19 am (UTC)
I bet - poor you! The only encouraging thing I can say is that at least it is finite!
Oct. 4th, 2007 02:50 pm (UTC)
Happy Birthday, Granny!

Are you going to tell her that strangers on the internet are wishing her well?

Oct. 5th, 2007 09:16 am (UTC)
Are you going to tell her that strangers on the internet are wishing her well?

In a manner of speaking. She doesn't know what computers or the internet is, so I just said my friends wished her happy birthday. :)
(Deleted comment)
Oct. 5th, 2007 09:17 am (UTC)
Thankee :)

She had a fabulous time and was totally in her element all day long.
( 16 comments — Leave a comment )


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