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My mother's tenants may well be the thing that finally buys me a one-way ticket to insanity. But let us not dwell on that! Or on the enrmous amounts of physical pain that I am in and how thousand and one tiny stresses from my work and my course are conspiring to make me feel like crying.

It's rainy and I'm achey, and in one of those moods where I just want someone to cuddle me and bring me tea and tell me that everything is going to be all right, there there, let us just curl up in bed now and drift our thoughts to happier realms.

So instead, let us talk of joyous things (do you have any joyous things you want to share? Now is the time to tell them!) or at very least things which have made me laugh.

1. My embassy's explanation for the prices they charge for consular services.

So, here we have the breakdown of the tax charged for resolution of requests about military service

Request for a resolution £11
Tax for the resolution £16
Tax for the act of physically giving you the resoluton £8
Actual cost: (forms x2) £1
Total: £36


2. First Cat is my boyfriend. He looooooves me. And he prefers to let me know about this with equal measures of love and possessiveness. When the time has come for me to go back home and for us to be reunited and stop the crushing loneliness of a Nina-less day he throws himself into my arms, or into my lap or weaves himself around my legs with in ecstatic throes of head-rubbing and purry love. But I am fickle. And if I should happen to do something so intrinsically immoral as oh, i don't know give any affection to the other cat, well First Cat hisses at his rival, gives me a dirty look and departs the premises in a huff. For I have Betrayed Our Love. I have Desecrated His Affection, and stamped on his heart. Only time will tell whether the baby will be The Last Straw.

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